‘It’s not you, it’s me’… heard that before? You are not alone sista!
You’ve got it sorted; great career, amazing friends, loving family… but there is one thing missing – the guy! The things not missing…the plethora of douche bags or the ‘decent ones’ that just don’t see how amaze balls you are!
Believing in love, you keep getting knocked back, fall down and get back on the horse. Those happily coupled-up friends keep saying to you – ‘you’re awesome, you will find someone, just give it time’, or ‘he doesn’t know what he is missing out on, you deserve better anyway’.
Time and time again, the same result… nothing more than a coffee date and that awkward smile as you get out of his car (is that the kiss me or hurry up and get out smile?!). You then get to a point where you can’t or don’t want to get back up and get back in the game. The definition of insanity after all, is doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result…
Two weeks ago I was here. I was done with the dating game. Did it have to be such a game!? You like someone you spend time with them, you tell them you like them. I was angry… angry at ‘them’ for not wanting to get to know me, or for being so hot and cold. No more. It really was them, not me!
Then, Mastin Kipp at ‘The Daily Love’, crossed my path – ‘Attracting emotionally unavailable guys? Here’s how to change that’. Hello smack to the face, right on cue. Check out his video here before you read on.
Surprised at your reactions? Share your thoughts in the comments section below. I surprisingly related very strongly with what he had to say. I felt reassured. Look within instead. Don’t get me wrong, we are enough just the way we are, however, it is about intentions, timing and readiness.
You are right Mastin, if I choose the emotionally unavailable guy he won’t push me to get uncomfortable and grow as a person. He will be happy to let me be and we will maintain a superficial, physical relationship. Not being vulnerable shows I’m tough; well that is what I thought.
‘We cultivate love when we allow our most vulnerable and powerful selves to be deeply seen and known, and when we honor the spiritual connection that grows from that offering with trust, respect, kindness and affection’ – Brene Brown. Check out her TED talk on vulnerability here.
And can I have it all? Time for my career, him, friends, family, looking after me? How much will change? What if it doesn’t work? What if it does? So much uncertainty, but also so much excitement and exhilaration. Embrace the ebs and flows of life – trust in the process. You can and will have it all x
Ready to do something about what I just wrote? Schedule a session with me here.